What happens in couples therapy?
When working with couples, the focus is on what is going on in the relationship and what the people in that relationship think needs attention. Often this is a sense of feeling stuck, of failing to resolve familiar disputes and arguments and of distance opening up between them.
I work using an approach called Emotionally Focused Therapy, which is a highly effective form of therapy that helps people understand and improve their emotional connection with themselves and others. It emerged in the 1980s and has been rigorously tested in clinical research.
This approach is considered the gold standard in this field and it helps people understand their feelings and the feelings of those around them, leading to healthier and more fulfilling relationships. It’s not just about finding quick fixes. It’s about addressing fundamental issues and creating lasting change.
EFT is rooted in attachment science, which has found that our emotions are central to our experiences and relationships. It suggests that we are naturally predisposed to have a secure sense of who we are and a sense of self we can trust and rely on. This solid base allows for strong, supportive bonds with others, and when these bonds are secure, we tend to be happier and healthier.
“The most functional way to regulate difficult emotions in love relationships is to share them.”
If you’re looking to deepen your personal connections, manage emotional challenges, strengthen your sense of self as a confident and competent person, and improve your family or romantic relationships, Emotionally Focused Therapy can be a transformative choice. It’s about building stronger connections, understanding self and each other better, and fostering emotional health, all of which are key to a happier, more fulfilling life.
You can read more about EFT here.
Sessions can be conducted online or in person and usually last 80 minutes. I usually suggest that these sessions be held in person, especially at the start of therapy. I typically meet with the couple together for two sessions, then with each person individually for one session each, before resuming work together.
If you are curious about exploring couples therapy, I am happy to discuss if this could be right for you.
Book a free 10-minute introductory chat if you would like to know more.